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It's like a bunch of robots pretending to be human. Theyll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! POLITICIAN:THERE IS NO EVIDENCE, NO ONE HAS PROVEN ANYTHING EVENTUALLY I'LL BE EXONERATED. They own all the important land. They dont want well informed, well educated people capable of critical thinking. As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you. Search. However, he calls himself an apatheist (meaning that he's an atheist who doesn't care about the topic). @Z(dXSm !4I And that's just sad.". THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. They want your retirement money. Theyre not interested in that. And we've all bought into it. 0000080920 00000 n People are stupid because, well, people are stupid. ', And let's not forget the humblebrags. But the POLITICIANS, god bless them or something like that, they're are at their most entertaining when they're are in trouble. So, it may seem like stand-up comedy, but I suspect Carlin is deadly serious. m o n t c l a i r . Hendra, a writer and comedian, talks with Rebecca . And the more noise there is, the harder it is to hear anything worth listening to. In particular it's fun to listen to Washington talk. Yeah, let's share our every thought and feeling with the entire world, because that's what we need, more information. They don't fall out of the sky. We don't need that many. He discusses political stance and also societal beliefs on the environment, and the Earth's resilience towards bombardment by pollution. He spoke about his book "Brain Droppings" and answered questions submitted by the audience. Michael Cooney was a speechwriter for @, George Carlin: 'Politicians don't actually say things, they INDICATE them', National Press Club - 1999. http://www.ravendevelopers.com/blog/2013/0 Bernie Sanders: 'So the next time you hear me attacked as a socialist, remember this', Georgetown University - 2015, Jimmy Carter: 'The threat is nearly invisible in ordinary ways. Global Search Search In. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. It's all just noise. But, the Incomplete List highlights his exceptional understanding of, love for, and talent with language, sound, and rythmn. But in war times they quickly become, our brave young fighting men and women stationed half way around the world in places whose name's they(POLITICIANS) can't pronounce, wandering if they will ever see their loved ones again. You can't have an opinion anymore without being labeled as something. They dont fall out of the sky. Comedian George Carlin addressed members and guests of the National Press Club in Washington, DC. Its called the American Dream,because you have to be asleep to believe it. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money.[6]. 0000001936 00000 n Two hundred years versus four and a half billion. 4 Mar. Speakola is a labour of love and Id be very grateful if you would share, tweet or like it. Did you ever think about the arithmetic? As I say, they're my work, they're my play, they're my passion. hb```b``na` cc`ahd`phQD"#. -{- f1^u0`cp@&CUoM;v> So put down your phone, step away from the computer, and go out into the world. First of all, its meaningless. 'Oh, I'm so exhausted from traveling all over Europe for the third time this year. Thats what the owners count on. His political commentary was scathing and on par with any of the greats, Pryor, Chappelle, Bruce. Results like these do not belong on the rsum of a Supreme Being. This is what we have to offer. George Carlin - National Press Club May 19, 1999. Such as the PROCESS: POLITICIAN:WE HAVE TO MOVE THE PROCESS FORWARD SO WE CAN IMPLEMENT THE PROVISIONS OF THE INITIATIVE IN ORDER TO MEET THESE CHALLENGES. BUT WHEN I DO, I'LL ADVISE YOU. I'm getting tired of that shit. They dont care about you at all at all AT ALL. On Election Day, I stay home. Carlin is usually spot on. 0000082419 00000 n As long he included one additional commandment: Genius is the ultimate source of music knowledge, created by scholars like you who share facts and insight about the songs and artists they love. 185 0 obj Before his death in June 2008, comedian George Carlin spent 10 years working on a memoir, Last Words, with his longtime friend Tony Hendra. That doesnt help them. This wiki was last updated on 11 Apr 2012 by: Today we're opening contributions to all readers. The fact that Americans will probably remain willfully ignorant of the big red, white and blue dick thats being jammed up their assholes everyday, because the owners of this country know the truth. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) It's so obvious that it almost goes without saying, but comedians are generally more intelligent and sensitive than the average person. Sure, here's a sample transcript of George Carlin talking about social media in one of his stand-up routines: "Let's talk about social media for a minute. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. All rights reserved. Yes, all the words are quite impolite. Clearly he's preparing us for something (LAUGHS). He pretty much smashed the nail squarely on the head. The only part I would take with a block of salt is the last in which he explains why he doesnt vote. I say that where the military is concern the extent of a POLITICIANS insincerity can be measured by how far around the world our soldiers are stationed and whether or not any of them(POLITICIANS) can pronounce it? Anyway enjoy it while it's h. I, on the other handwho did not votewho did not votewho, in fact, did not even leave the house on Election Day, am in no way responsible for what these people have done and have every right to complain as loud as I want about the mess you created that I had nothing to do with. I always thought it was kind of funny and someone out of character for a POLITICIAN to go out of his way to point out the low level of American intelligence (LAUGHS), when indeed his very job depends upon it. Here it is: Why are there ten? e d u / e t d / 4 7 1)/Rect[72.0 131.7406 279.0264 143.4594]/StructParent 6/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Garbage out. Follow the link for the full transcript, its worth it, but here are a few choice excerpts: When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. Another favorite distortion is Public Service. "No child left behind. Every time. A person who routinely spends his days torturing the language complains; POLITICIAN:THEY TWISTED MY WORDS. (LAUGHS). George Carlin - Euphemisms I don't like words that hide the truth. m o n t c l a i r . They are irrelevant. MISTAKES WERE MADE, DON'T LOOK AT ME, PROBABLY SOMEONE IN MY OFFICE. Marc Allan: Hi. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. They own you. (BEGIN VIDEO CLIP) GEORGE CARLIN, COMEDIAN: Takes the cake! He often commented on contemporary political issues in the United States and satirized the excesses of American culture. I mean, have you ever looked at people's Facebook or Instagram profiles? Then youre just what theyre looking for. But marital fidelity is a good idea, so I suggest we keep the idea and call this commandment "Thou shalt not be unfaithful." Apparently, his last ballot was cast in 1972for McGovern. It would seem to fly in the face of that other rhetorical standby that: POLITICIAN:THE AMERICAN PEOPLE ARE LOT SMARTER THAN THEY ARE GIVEN CREDIT FOR. <<76B7883B53B3B2110A00D082ECFCFC7F>]/Prev 777933>> He missed this one. George Carlin was an outspoken comic, known for his brash sense of humor, foul language and controversial views on politics, religion and other sensitive subjects. startxref Youre just gunna wind up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans [leaders]. Whenever the issue of term limits comes up, I always tell people the only term limits I'm interested in would be to limit some of the terms used by politicians. That's the problem in this country too many people getting on with their lives. Yeah, right. Politicians have traditionally hidden behind three things, the flag, the Bible and children. Local elections, special elections, and mid-terms, especially. You got people walking around bumping into each other, looking down at their phones, tweeting, Instagramming, Facebooking, like they're all little paparazzi. GEORGE CARLIN: I want to tell you something about words that I think is important. George Carlin speech at the National Press Club (May 13, 1999) "George Carlin delivered a humorous speech in which he ma Show more Show more George Carlin on Being Arrested for. The PEOPLE are fucked. What? Fuck hope. You know, that thing that's supposed to make us more connected and informed, but really just turns us into a bunch of self-obsessed, attention-seeking, validation-craving zombies. It has to be the WHOLE THING. Something is definitely wrong. Now you can just hide behind a screen and fire off your misspelled, grammatically incorrect rants to thousands of strangers. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Then you're just what they're looking for. Press J to jump to the feed. But just as pressure and heat transform coal into diamonds, it's that frustration, social pressure and the heat of anger that transforms us into comedians. endstream x\}_nK '!oF+$SW9E fX{]YTUOm9qhSO+_7L|*kqyHUwor}=qgw;WnrG7no8G*w6a2Uq K|CQWO_nT]}wbvASBT=tE.t6C}qC)onmg2uAWq|9xLSg They want more for themselves and less for everybody else, but Ill tell you what they dont want: They dont want a population of citizens capable of critical thinking. Unless we think of some way to fight back. 188 0 obj George Carlin Politicians : Choosing Life or Death in Capitalist America.. George Carlin Politicians youtu.be. He was a frequent performer and guest host on The Tonight Show during the three-decade Johnny Carson era, and hosted the first episode of Saturday Night Live in 1975. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care about you until you reach military age. of American cultural paradoxes. "Political correctness is America's newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. endobj `XX /;VU}`M%VO #5Zfb-> He is widely regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comics; one newspaper called Carlin "the dean of counterculture comedians". And if we had a list like that, I wouldn't mind that brilliant judge in Alabama displaying it prominently in the courthouse wall. 190 0 obj "Forget the politicians. No contest. Regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comedians of all time, he was dubbed "the dean of counterculture comedians". You, and I, are not in the big club. These people on social media, they're not your friends. Its what our system produces: Garbage in. for Caitlin & Johnny - 2015, Korey Soderman (via Kyle): 'All our lives I have used my voice to help Korey express his thoughts, so today, like always, I will be my brothers voice' for Kyle and Jess - 2014, Bruce Springsteen: 'They're keepers of some of the most beautiful sonic architecture in rock and roll', Induction U2 into Rock Hall of Fame - 2005, Olivia Colman: 'Done that bit. https://www.scripts.com/writer/george_carlin/6024. Im sure as soon as the election is over your country will improve immediately. People go on there, they play with the animals, they pet them, they feed them, but they don't get any real interaction. Its hard to say if he was a Republican or a Democrat, however, as he refused to vote, considering it pointless because voting, as he said, is the illusion of choice.[4]. While you're here, we have a public discord server. George Carlin. Two reasons. (LAUGHS). They say, Well, if you dont vote you have no right to complain. But wheres the logic in that? The planet is fine. "Now, there's one thing you might have noticed I don't complain about: politicians. It's like the Wild West of the internet, but with more trolls. So I know that a little later on this year, youre going to have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much. And then there's the political posts. %%EOF THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. If it's a really serious matter, they make a JUDGMENT: POLITICIAN: I HAVEN'T MADE A JUDGMENT ON THAT. It covers the most famous 'rant' part of the speech. <>/Metadata 181 0 R/Outlines 136 0 R/Pages 174 0 R/StructTreeRoot 145 0 R/Type/Catalog/ViewerPreferences<>>> They don't fall out of the sky. Let's get started! I think what we really need more of is ritual suicide, you know. Copyright 2017 iComedyTV.com. Carlin was known for his dark comedy and reflections on politics, religion, psychology, language and taboo subjects. Everybody says they suck. They don't get any real human contact. Juno3127 10 years ago You couldn't be more wrong. Theres a reason for this, theres a reason education SUCKS, and its the same reason it will never, ever, EVER be fixed. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) And don't get me started on the selfies. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives don't care about you until you reach military age. But hey, I guess it's just part of my glamorous jet-setting lifestyle.'. They dont pass through a membrane from another reality. Now normally during peace times the politician would refer to people in the military as: POLITICIAN:OUR YOUNG MEN AND WOMEN STATIONED AROUND THE WORLD. Never mind the press conferences get the big knife out of the drawer. People are so quick to judge and attack each other over the smallest things. <> Sure, there's some good stuff on there, but it's mostly just people filming themselves doing stupid things and hoping to go viral. You know, those posts that pretend to be modest, but really they're just a way of showing off. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(digitalcommons@montclair.edu)/Rect[400.0562 72.3516 527.5898 82.8984]/StructParent 7/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> THOU SHALT NOT TAKE THE NAME OF THE LORD THY GOD IN. They own everything. As a lifelong stand-up comedian, Carlin had a lot of opportunities to speak his mindand religion and politics were two of his favorite subjects. Nobody cares what you had for breakfast, or what your cat did, or what your opinion is on the latest political scandal. Because if it is really just the fault of the politicians then where are all the other bright people of conscience? By the way, its the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. And American English is loaded with euphemisms. Ill let Carlin tell you what he thinks. No one has PROBLEMS anymore. %PDF-1.3 You have owners. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? A friend is someone who will come over and help you move. Two reasons I dont vote. The stand up comic was an artist who did more than articulate the public's subconscious; he. I dont vote. He said: [There was] a lot of classroom freedomin fact there was so much freedom that by eighth grade, many of us had lost the faith. Funny, Humor, Beer. Yeah the public sucks. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. People like to twist that around, I know. And it's not just that social media is a distraction from real life, it's also a way of creating a false sense of connection. Famous Quotes by George Carlin about Politics. (CLAPS, LAUGHS). This is the best we can do, folks. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents()/Rect[72.0 612.5547 302.8926 625.4453]/StructParent 3/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> 191 0 obj Fuck hope!. You got people spouting their opinions left and right, like they're some kind of expert on the subject. Bruce Lee was raised Catholic and Buddhist. [FINAL NOTE: If you want to dig deeper into Carlins brilliant mind vis--vis comments on politicians and the doublespeak they are prone to use, check out The Consultation Institutes George Carlin on the language of politics. The truth is, obedience and respect should not be granted automatically. "A transcript of George Carlin talking about Social Media" First Response: First Response Certainly! Moses could have carried them down the hill in his pocket. (LAUGHS). Maybe two hundred thousand? Copyright 2017 iComedyTV.com. I on the other hand, who did not vote, WHO DID NOT VOTE. I don't words that conceal reality. Been through all kinds of things worse than us. Not in the abstract they don't. (6K"F;nyV-()*bt3QgsX;a\IC'h%7. Recorded on November 5, 2005, Beacon Theater, New York City, New York. Everyone's taking pictures of themselves, all the time. The only difference is, when I get finished masturbating, Im gunna have a little something to show for it, folks.. Where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans ready to step in and save the nation and lead the way? He is mostly non-political except for his involvement with the environmental organization, Greenpeace. It's a psychologically satisfying number: the top ten; the ten most wanted; the ten best-dressed. endobj People post pictures of themselves and their lives, trying to create a narrative that they're happy, successful, and popular. And theyre elected by American citizens. They should be based on the parents' performance. George Carlin Discusses 'Silly Putty and Napalm' Aired June 08, 2001 - 21:00 ET. Because at the end of the day, social media is just a bunch of zeros and ones floating around in cyberspace. [5], Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. That's a friend. Cause Americans have a lot of trouble dealing with reality. Off-course no politician would admit to such a lowly station as working in Government. Such a nice touch. 0000006309 00000 n document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); All photographs on this website (unless otherwise indicated) were created by and are the property of Daniel R. Joder and may not be used for any purpose without permission. Then, as the controversy continues to heat up, he moves to his next level of complaint: POLITICIAN:THE WHOLE THING HAS BEEN BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION. But theres a reason. I mean, why do we need to see some idiot eating Tide pods or jumping off a roof into a pool? (Yes, I know, the USS America is a humongous, gargantuan behemoth, and the rudder very, very, very small, but we can still make it sloooowly turn to a certain general heading if we all pile our [intelligent] votes in the wheelhouse. Youre just going to wind up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? "In America, anyone can become president. Everybody says they suck. 0000053233 00000 n Difference. If you want to make a difference in the world, if you want to connect with people in a meaningful way, put down the phone, step away from the computer, and go have a real conversation with someone. They dont pass through a membrane from some other reality. It is a crisis of confidence', Crisis of Confidence speech - 1979 , Jon Stewart: "They responded in five seconds", 9-11 first responders, Address to Congress - 2019, Jacinda Ardern: 'They were New Zealanders. Been here four and a half billion years. I'M NOT SURE; I HAVEN'T DETERMINED THAT YET (LAUGHS). You dont. % ], Your email address will not be published. endobj They got you by the balls. Web. 0000015335 00000 n The planet has been here four and a half billion years. And besides, all of these sites, they're just an illusion. Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. When they're in trouble, their explanations usually begin simply with words like MISS-COMMUNICATION; QUESTION:WHAT DID YOU DO WRONG, SENATOR?POLITICIAN:WELL, IT WAS A MISS-COMMUNICATION. Because the owners, the owners of this country dont want that. I'm tired of fucking Earth Day, I'm tired of these self-righteous environmentalists, these white, bourgeois liberals who think the only thing wrong with this country is there aren't enough bicycle paths. Obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. Theyll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! I dont vote. Your email address will not be published. 186 0 obj He was also known for his outspoken views on government and politics. endobj 189 0 obj George Carlins daughter, @kelly_carlin, on her first radio show with guest Paul Provenza, talking about this routine. His parents split up when he was an infant because his . Sure, here's a possible transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Let's talk about social media. 194 0 obj Oh, and I cant finish without recommending the routine Carlin calls his Incomplete List of Impolite Words. Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web! You're just trying to impress people you don't even know. Dog, Cat, Thinking. %PDF-1.7 % 0000002011 00000 n Everybody complains about politicians. George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 - June 22, 2008) was an American comedian, actor, author, and social critic. POLITICIAN:HE HASN'T RESPONDED TO MY INITIATIVE. All rights reserved. Narrow, unenlightened self-interest doesn't impress me. George Carlin: How you doing? Fuck hope! We could see through the hypocracy and illogic of our parents and teachers, but because of our age and size we couldn't do anything about it. They don't care about the planet. OR: I WAS QUOTED OUT OF CONTEXT. Its what our system produces. Maybe you'll find some of the features useful , Ignore this comment if your post doesn't have a prompt. No contest. George Carlin. Marc Allan: Oh, okay, good. trailer Maher is a liberal who has endorsed at least the last two Democratic presidential candidates. It's like they're part of some kind of digital echo chamber. George Carlin: I'm in Hollywood, Los Angeles. George Carlin: In football, the object is for the quarterback, otherwise known as the field general, to be on target with his aerial assault, riddling the defense by . stream He discusses political stance and also societal beliefs on the environment, and the Earth's resilience towards bombardment by pollution. They dont want people who are smart enough to sit around a kitchen table and think about how badly theyre getting fucked by a system that threw them overboard 30 fucking years ago. 160 Copy quote. POLITICIAN:I'M IN PUBLIC SERVICE, I LIKE AMERICA DON'T YOU? Video Transcript - In Defense of Politicians (George Carlin, 1996) "Now there's one thing you mighta noticed I don't complain about: politicians. Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Social media, huh? The table has tilted folks. He was known for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and taboo subjects. They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? They don't fall out of the sky. But social media is just a symptom of our narcissistic, attention-deficit culture. xWnF}WDh%&^6F%&T{84e[A0@-3wUr-*l:, XF{HT+T0?LL q8"y1yY0LV"vQ|8:GwPBr,&]Qt7oz5n Its a big club, and. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. It's just a curated version of ourselves that we want to present to the world. Maybe something else sucks around here like: THE PUBLIC. I don't like euphemisms, or euphemistic language. I'm so interesting, I'm so important!'. George Carlin on Voting Transcript Now there's one thing you might have noticed i don't complain about: politicians. They OWN YOU. But that would be much too direct! A clean place to live. 0000003180 00000 n Where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans ready to step in and save the nation and lead the way? I HAVEN'T DETERMINED THAT YET. "I don't believe anything the government tells me." - George Carlin 02. Pfft! It was during the waning of the Nixon years, where confidence in government was beginning its slide down to the Stygian depths where it rests today; the Vietnam War, and racial unrest, continued to rage on. everybody complains about politicians. But here's the thing: social media isn't real life. 01. Save the planet, we don't even know how to take care of ourselves yet. [wptabs style=wpui-mre-basic mode=horizontal background=false] These are the websites where people go to express themselves, right? 0000001412 00000 n Good honest hard-working people continue, these are people of modest means, continue to elect these rich cock suckers who dont give a fuck about you.they dont give a fuck about you they dont give a FUCK about you. Carlin, for 40-years, was one of the greatest comedians ever.